Wesley L.
I was selected for the Curvy Girl Model Call. It was a wonderful experience and such a fun time. Due to my circumstances, I was/am hoping for two things: first, to be an inspiration to women, young and old, who have or will go through breast cancer at some point in their life, and secondly, to help me continue on my path of recovery (physically and mentally) and learning to love the “new/altered” me.
In 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and had a bilateral mastectomy. I was 30 years old. I lost everything in the flood of August 2016 while going through chemo and was ghosted by my boyfriend of 7 years. I shaved my head myself, alone. My first plastic surgeon did a horrific botched job and a year later I had to have a second reconstructive surgery. Chemo did a number on my body as I gained over 80lbs in a year. I lost all hair, eyelashes, eyebrows and it took a long time to get some back. Two years after remission, I had to have a hysterectomy as precancer cells were found. I longed for the days in beoming a new mom, as I had my daughter when I was 17, but that dream was also taken from me.
As I couldn’t do much during the years of recovery, I searched a lot on Pinterest. Looking at other survivors, searching for inspiration and hoping I, too, would someday be myself again.
I found a lot of mastectomy scars were covered with beautiful tattoos and always favored one in particular. It was elegant and turned something so negative into something so beautiful that anyone could admire. But I knew as a single mom barely making ends meet, I wouldn’t ever be able to afford anything like it.
In 2019, I saw a random post on Facebook for an organization called p.ink. Once a year, all across the country, tattoo artists donate free tattoos to cover mastectomy scars to selected individuals. I put my name in figuring I wouldn’t get it but I gave it a shot anyway. However, I was selected! I was so excited. Afterthinking about it, I honestly felt like I should give my spot up to someone who was really struggling with their scars. yes, I struggled. But I know there are others that struggled more. I battled with this. And decided that I deserved it just as much. I fought even on the days when I thought I had nothing to fight for and on the days when I had no fight left in me.
During my recovery, I met my husband. I had no hair, was very much overweight. I had nothing to my name because of the flood. And he saw me for me. Loved me for me. We’ve been married for 2 years no. I’ve since then adopted his two daughters and we are putting them through school and sports.
I gave the model call a lot of thought. I’ve had some amazing doctors over the past few years to help get my weight down and heal my body from the damage chemo did. And to Find myself again.
The boudoir sessions are amazing and such a beautiful thing to keep personal. But when I think about my story, and those days where I scrolled Pinterest and Google. When trying to find a way to make myself feel beautiful again, finding the pictures of brave women who posted their scars and their tattoos, the fear they overcame to do such a thing and putting themselves out there for possible criticism and judgment, has inspired me to do the same.
Because of them, I want to give inspiration to the same women who went through and will go through what I did and hopefully show them that even through the stormiest weather, it can never rain forever.
